sexaddictionhelp.ca Course two
Course two · $197 CAD · Self-paced
What recovery actually requires
Course one gave you the picture. This one is about what changes it — the two systems you are actually working with, the interrupt at the point where the chain starts, what daily accountability has to look like to be worth anything, and an honest account of how each layer tends to move.
There are two possibilities in front of you, and only one of them is recovery. Either it went quiet, or it got quieter about it.
You are the least reliable narrator of your own quiet. This course is about how to tell the difference, and what to build so that the answer is the first one.
What you get
- Four modules, sixteen lessons
- Four downloads — the two-system tracker, the tool reference card, the transparency log, the recovery horizon map
- Text-based and self-paced, and built to be reread rather than completed
Purchasing isn’t open yet. The free guide is how you’ll hear when it is.
The thing this course is really about
Speed of shutdown is not absence.
If it got quieter about it, the cue still arrives, everything assembles exactly as it always did, and you shut it down quickly and well. That feels like mastery, which is why it fools almost everyone, including the man doing it. A man who is superb at closing it down all day is still having it all day.
Nothing on the outside distinguishes that from the real thing. The count tells you about your grip. It tells you nothing about what you are gripping.
So the work is not more grip. It is the interrupt at the point where the chain starts, the deciding handed out of your private control, and the thing the pattern was solving for finally solved some other way — because if it isn’t, the structure rebuilds itself in a form you have not learned to recognise yet.
The count tells you about your grip. It tells you nothing about what you are gripping.
One instruction from the whole course, if you only take one: watch the sentences. The permission that made all of it allowable lives in the sentences you say to yourself, and it is still saying them.
What is in it
Four modules, sixteen lessons
Module two is the practical one. Module three contains the idea most men have never heard, and it is the one that decides whether any of the rest holds.
Course one first if you haven’t read it — this one assumes the five layers and does not re-explain them.
One — The two systems, and why both matter
You stopped, and it was not enough. This module explains why that happened, in plain words, without treating it as a failure of effort.
- The wanting loop — what it is and what collapses it
- The discomfort loop — what it is and why it persists
- When intimacy becomes the regulation site
- Building regulation without the pattern
Two — The tools: daily practice for this specific pattern
The practical module. A tool does not cure anything; it buys you the four or five seconds between the automatic part and the deliberate part, which is where every choice you have actually lives.
- The traffic light system
- The interrupt protocol — five steps
- The daily accountability structure
- High-risk environments and proactive planning
Three — Transparency as recovery
Recovery at this layer means the deciding moves out of your private control. It also means the daily reporting does not go to her — that isn’t transparency, it is the job she has already been doing without consent, now with a title.
- Why secrecy is the engine
- What proactive transparency looks like
- The reserve bank — and why it must be empty
- When transparency feels like control
Four — What genuine change looks like over time
The honest arc. You can stop the behaviour, build the tools, dismantle the permission and hand over the deciding — and if the thing the pattern was solving for is still unsolved, the structure will find a way to rebuild.
- The three phases of recovery
- What the risk of return actually looks like
- What she will notice before you do
- The life available after this
What this course will not do
It will not give you a number. No percentages, no counts presented as findings, no timeline. Anyone who hands you a number for this is guessing, and a guess dressed as a fact is not something to build a marriage on. What the course describes is shape, not measurement.
It will not finish. Nobody arrives at this and stays there permanently — it is not a certificate, it is a condition that is maintained. And there is one layer you almost certainly cannot reach on your own, which is why a therapist is not an optional extra here. The course says so plainly rather than selling you the idea that reading is enough.
It is not therapy and it is not couples work. Buying it doesn’t create a professional relationship between us, and nothing in it is a way of arriving at a diagnosis or should be used as one.
$197 CAD · Not yet open for purchase
Course one, then this one
This course assumes you already have the map. If you don’t, start at What This Pattern Actually Is — or at the free guide, which is thirteen pages and costs nothing.
When it opens: fourteen days, no reason required, refunded in full. You will not be asked how much of it you read.
You’ll hear from me directly when both open.
What this is.
Educational material. It is not therapy, it is not couples work, and buying it doesn’t create a professional relationship between us. Nothing here is a way of arriving at a diagnosis and nothing here should be used as one. If you are working with a therapist, bring it to them.
Before you start.
If you are in acute distress, if you are having thoughts of ending your life, or if there is violence in your home, this course is not the right thing to be reading right now. Get help first, and come back to this later.
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. In Canada, the 9-8-8 Suicide Crisis Helpline is available 24/7 — call or text 9-8-8.
Elizabeth Joy Dubois, MSW, RSW · Registered Social Worker and psychotherapist · Ontario
© 2026 · sexaddictionhelp.ca · Terms and refunds
Much of this course is about what you do differently around her. What she has actually been living with is written out at betrayaltrauma.ca — the same pattern, written for the partner.